Digest for Saturday, April 04, 1998

Topics of the day:

1. Milford Mill Class of 1959
2. blond painting the porch
3. More Men Jokes of course!

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Date:    Sat, 4 Apr 1998 03:56:31 -0500
From:    Jim Moore Jr <jimjr@QIS.NET>
Subject: Milford Mill Class of 1959 <adult humor>

*   Richard and Jeannie decided to "go steady".  Several weeks
  later he was quite pleasantly surprised to find she was very
  adept at sex.  "Have you done this before ?" he inquired.
    "Yes, but just once." Jeannie replied.
    "Oh ?  And with who ?" Richard asked.
    "The Varsity Football Team." she said.
                                - - - - -

*   The sex ed teacher opened the class with, "I guess y'all are
  wondering why we waited until you were seniors before conducting
  this class in sex education."
    "Sure !" said Bryan.  "So we can find out what we've been doing
  wrong the past 4 years."
                                - - - - -

* Believe it or not, in High School, I dated a girl who always
  got straight "A's".  Carolyn was nice enuff, but every time I
  sent her a love letter, she sent it back corrected.
                                - - - - -

* You think we weren't a tuff bunch though.  Hell, the Chess Team
  was on steroids.
                                - - - - -

* Times were simpler for the girls of the Class of '59 then they
  are now.  I mean for one thing, none of them went crazy trying
  to look or act as young as their Mothers.

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Date:    Sat, 4 Apr 1998 12:32:26 -0500
From:    James R. Muller <computer25@JUNO.COM>
Subject: blond painting the porch

Julie, the blonde, was getting pretty desperate for money.  She
decided to go to the nicer, richer neighborhoods around town and
look for odd jobs as a handy woman. The first house she came to, a man
answered the door and told Julie, "Yeah, I have a job for you.
How >would you like to paint the porch?"
"Sure that sounds great!" said Julie.
"Well, how much do you want me to pay you?"  asked the man.
"Is fifty bucks alright?" Julie asked.
"Yeah, great. You'll find the paint and ladders you'll need in
thegarage." The man went back into his house to his wife who had
been listening.
"Fifty bucks!  Does she know the porch goes all the way around
the house?" asked the wife.
"Well she must, she was standing right on it!" her husband replied.
About 45 minutes later, Julie knocked on the door. "I'm all
finished," she told the surprised homeowner.

The man was amazed. "You painted the whole porch?"
"Yeah," Julie replied, "I even had some paint left,  so I put on
two coats!"
The man reached into his wallet to pay Julie. "Oh, and by the
way," said Julie, "That's not a Porch, it's a Ferrari."

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Date:    Sat, 4 Apr 1998 16:38:20 -0800
From:    CHARITY D CRENSHAW <charity.com1@JUNO.COM>
Subject: More Men Jokes of course! <offensive to overly defensive men>

Why does a man only get half hour lunch breaks?
            So his boss won't have to retrain him.

What's the useless piece of skin attached to the male member?     A man.

Did you hear about the guy who rushed his pregnant wife to the pizza
parlor because he heard they advertised free deliveries?

How do you break a dumb man's finger?
      Punch him in the nose.

What's a stupid man's idea of safe sex?

 1. Not doing it on top of scaffolding.

  2. Doing it when his wife's away.

  3. Giving you a false name and address.


Not all women are silly, some are single.

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